


Useless in Raftfleet

by Team_Two_Cats



Series: Useless (Suikoden V) [3]
Category: Suikoden, Suikoden V
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Disaster, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:33:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25147774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Team_Two_Cats/pseuds/Team_Two_Cats
Summary: Out from under the thumb of the Barrows and leading a rebellion against (and to save) his sister, Frey's still in turmoil. Lucretia is the one truly in charge, and despite his strides, something's missing. Can he find it on his travels, gaining allies and uncovering secrets from the ancient past, or is he just destined to remain useless?
Relationships: Freyjadour Falenas/Lorelai, Freyjadour Falenas/Zweig
Series: Useless (Suikoden V) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1401328
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

Frey swallows, trying not to think about the swaying of the boat, the small ways nothing in Raftfleet seems solid. He should focus on the war, on his mission, on the daily tasks that Lucretia doesn’t exactly order him to do even as he feels he’s moving through a dance he doesn’t know the steps of. He should focus on building up the army, gaining allies, preparing to face the Godwins again. But the more he thinks about reporting in at the Dahak, listening to Lucretia and Kisara pass along what they think he needs to know, the further his feet take him toward the outermost ships of the flotilla.

He needs to get fucked is what he needs.

Of course, if that’s the case, why isn’t he sneaking into the Dahak and pulling Zegai into a closet nearing the training hall? Something stops him, something he tells himself isn’t quite wounded pride. He’s mostly forgiven the man for leaving in Huad, for walking away when Frey was such a mess after his parents’ deaths. He understands, on some level, that he wasn’t great company then, and Zegai was never unclear on what they had. Now that he’s back, Frey feels his traitor body lean toward the former gladiator when they’re in the same room. His body flushes, his cock stirs.

It’s not that he can’t get over Zegai being, well…Zegai, and caring more about the battle than the sex. It’s that Frey fears falling into old patterns. He fears he’s changed since Huad. How, he’s not sure. For the better? He hopes. But he’s not quite ready to face that. Not after what happened in Rainwall, not after what happened with Luserina. Not after being chosen by the Dawn Rune.

But he does really need to get fucked.

Frey sighs, goes over his mental list of the people on board. There’s Lun, of course—she’s not shy, and has already intimated that she’d be up for some fun. And Sorensen was cute, if fairly oblivious. Cornelio and Josephine were…probably too much work at the moment. Maybe Kyle…

“Lost, Prince?”

Frey jumps, shaken from his thoughts as Lyon steps beside him.

“Not exactly,” he says. He can tell her expression without turning to see it, so keeps his gaze pointed outward, toward the water. “Just…”

“Looking to get fucked?”

He forgets sometimes she knows him as well as she does.

“Gotta live up to my reputation,” he says.

Lyon is silent a moment, and that makes him turn. She’s looking out at the water now.

“Something wrong?” he asks, and she meets his gaze. There’s something there, a searching like she doesn’t quite recognize him. He wonders if she didn’t expect him to ask. He’s changed, and it seems neither of them quite know what to make of it.

“I’m worried,” she says. “About Lucretia taking advantage of that reputation. Taking advantage of you.”

He forces a smile. “You really think she’ll whore me out to every noble who’s willing in exchange for support?”

Her mouth twists, and he can tell he’s not far off.

“It’s not that I’d mind,” he adds. “Too much, at least.”

She shoves his shoulder. “See, that’s what I’m worried about. Not that you’d mind. But that you wouldn’t. You’ve spent most of your life pampered, privileged, and useless. But I saw something in you back in Rainwall. Something you probably still haven’t seen in yourself. Potential. To be more than a slutty Falenan prince.”

Frey turns back toward the water. “Sorry to disappoint you,” he says, “but I _am_ a slutty Falenan prince. Too late to put the genie back in the bottle on that one. And I don’t want to…” He almost says _change_. But he’s not so sure that’s right. “I don’t want to lose myself.”

Lyon snorts and Frey considers turning and challenging her but she’d just kick his ass.

“But have you even _found_ _youself_?”

Frey opens his mouth, closes it. The question resonates in him, shakes him.

“I’m not sure I’d know where to start,” he admits.

“Then it’s a good thing you’ve got people who care about you. Luserina and I have been talking, and we’ve gotten Josephine—”

“Josephine? You’re going to have to try harder than—”

“Shut up a moment, okay?” Lyon puts a hand on his shoulder. “We’ve gotten Josephine to make you something. A new outfit.”

“You want to give me…a makeover?”

Lyon sighs. “We want to give you a fresh start. And some distance from that reputation of yours. Lucretia just wants to use you. Differently, and hopefully better, than the Barrows. But use you all the same. You’re a tool to her. And that might be okay for Falena. But for you? Prince…”

Frey looks down at himself. His outfit. Airy, but revealing enough. The traditional costume of a Falenan prince. He’s never considered it, really. It was always what he was supposed to wear. Just like…everything. But he’d stepped away from that when he’d agree to lead this little resistance. When he'd agreed to be a part of something different. And all at once he saw that it fit him, but didn’t suit him anymore. Fucking Lyon was right. Like she’d ever let him forget it.

“Okay,” he says. “Okay.”

On his hand, the Dawn Rune seems to pulse faintly, though in approval or condemnation he’s not sure.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Off toward the mysterious Sindar ruins, Frey has a quick diversion with Zweig before something...interesting happens.

Zweig wraps his arm across Frey’s chest, hand slipping at his throat, and increases his pace. Frey, arms braced against the wall in front of him, groans as he pushes back against each thrust. He hadn’t exactly planned on this, but he had to admit the bookish and arrogant scholar knew his way around a staff. And he has to admit, his new clothes look good even bunched around his ankles.

Zweig grunts and jerks deeper still, and the feeling of the man coming is enough to push Frey over the edge as well, moving one hand over his mouth to keep from being too loud, though the rest of the ship probably knows full well what they’re doing. Zweig pulls back suddenly, and Frey tips, tumbles to the floor with a yelp.

“Heh.”

Frey glares as Zweig steps back and adjusts his clothes.

“Well that was fun,” the scholar says, and turns toward the door.

Frey’s eyes shoot wide and he quickly rolls to the side, out of view from the outside as Zweig makes his exit. Bastard. It takes him a moment to regain his legs, and he winces as he feels Zweig’s cum wet around his ass. This was going to be an uncomfortable afternoon until he could properly clean.

From outside he can already hear Zweig loudly talking, no doubt bragging, and Frey covers his face in his hand. Why the fuck did he think that was a good idea? He glares accusingly down as his spent cock. Lyon was not going to like this one. Hardly slipping free from his reputation. But then, he doesn’t exactly regret this, either. He needed the release, and he can feel his body focus as he comes down from the pleasant high of getting off.

On his hand, the Dawn Rune pulses hard and he gasps as it glows a bright blue, almost white. Sensation seers his body, electric but cold, sending chills down his back and up his chest and into his limbs. He kneels, rune pulled against his chest, body hunched. The light dazzles, erupts into a silent explosion of sparkles that quickly fade, leaving the room once more dimmed.

Frey forces a ragged breath. Another. The rune is still now, but there’s a lingering chill and he swears he sees his breath fog in front of him until that, too, fades, and he feels…he feels amazing. He stands, clothes still a mess around his ankles but the mess from Zweig is gone and he feels clean, refreshed. Taut and powerful. He gives a yip of a laugh and quickly pulls up his pants, does back up the straps, straightens his braid.

What the fuck was _that?_ He has no answer, but it’s left a smile on his face and an idea that he doesn’t want to shake.

He exits to the deck of the ship. Immediately Lyon moves towards him, concern etched into her features. Sialeeds isn’t far behind, though her face is stormier. Probably pissed he’s giving the royal family a bad name, though maybe not. She’s been distant since his decision to embrace the uprising. Since his decision to ally with Lucretia.

“Prince, are you—”

“Never better,” he says, grinning. It stops her short, like she was expecting to find him confused or hurt or sulking. But Frey doesn’t even stop. He sees Zweig has cornered Kyle and is obviously telling him all about how the two of them had just…

If he’s trying to make Kyle jealous, Frey muses, he doesn’t know the queen’s knight. Kyle was one of Frey’s firsts, and though the two had never been that close (Kyle was much more interested in women, though Frey had proven feminine enough when it mattered), the stories he could tell about what he and Frey had gotten up to would put Zweig’s to shame.

Speaking of putting Zweig to shame… Frey steps between the two men and smiles widely. Kyle gives him a questioning look that Frey ignored in favor of Zweig, who crosses his arms and raises one eyebrow.

“Yes?” Zweig says.

“Oh, I was just thinking that you probably didn’t get a chance to really clean up after that rough fuck and I can’t bear to think of you getting an infection because of my ass.”

Zweig opens his mouth but can’t seem to manage words.

“Trust me, I’ve had extensive lectures about the importance of sexual hygiene.”

Which is true, for all that Kyle snorts with laughter. He just often…didn’t do a great job of following the instructions of his tutors and doctors. Frey takes another step forward, into Zweig’s bubble, and sticks his tongue out, running over his own bottom lip.

“I thought maybe you’d like me to…clean it for you?”

Zweig flushes a deep crimson and steps back, bumps his back against the raining of the ship. Around them, everyone has turned to watch, and the attention seems to unnerve him. His eyes dart to the side, seeming to try and focus on anything but Frey.

Which means he’s not ready when Frey slides forward, hooks his leg, and in one fluid motion tips him over the railing and into the river. And there is shocked stillness. For a good minute. Before the rest of the people on deck react to the sputtering shouts of Zweig in the water and the laugh that Frey can’t quite suppress.

“You know, we do need his help exploring the ruins,” Lyon says, beside him again.

Frey hums. “And he needs us to open the doors he’s so desperate to pass. At least this way he’ll remember that he’s not doing us any favors. He’s working for the resistance, and that means learning to play nice.”

Lyon looks him up and down. There’s that expression again, like she’s not quite sure she knows him. But under that is a small smirk.

While the rest of the crew fishes Zweig out of the river, Frey fixes his gaze ahead, ahead feels something building inside him that spills into a smile and a strange humming tune he feels like he remembers from a dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And some sex. Not sure there's going to be more in the next chapter, but definitely again before the end of this installment in the series. Cheers!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frey and company make their way through the Ceras Lake Ruins, which turn out to be tougher than anticipated. As most of the party nears the limits of their endurance, though, they come across a mysterious woman.

Around him, the rest of the group seems tired, worn. A bruise purples the otherwise hard line of Kyle’s jaw. Zweig limps, leaning hard on his staff as he walks. Sialeeds nurses a long cut down her arm. Even Lyon is sweating, hair just a bit messy and out of place—a testament to just how hard she’s working to keep them all safe. But Frey bounces as he walks, and when the battles come, his body feels light as he strikes. The tune before is playing through him, and despite the difficulty of the battles, he feels…great.

Everyone else heaves a sigh of relief when Zweig informs them that they’re almost to the door with the mark of the Dawn Rune on it. Frey nods, and there’s a part of him that is curious what it will be. What secrets they might learn. A part of him fears it, though. Not because of whatever battle is waiting for them, but because then they’ll leave. And there’s something about these ruins that infuse him with energy. His rune feels…almost alive, and for the first time since his parents’ deaths he feels weightless, unconcerned with the war and the Godwins and all of it. He just wants to run through the twisting catacombs of the ruins, laughing, shouting.

He doesn’t even really notice when the woman steps out of the shadows and into their path. But Lyon’s sudden shift in demeanor brings his focus back to the corridor they’re in, to their mission. To the strange woman with the giant blue…gem? On her forehead.

“Zweig!” she yells. “I suppose you were hoping to get into the deeper ruins without me? Keep all the secrets for yourself?”

They all turn to Zweig, who grimaces.

“This isn’t your concern, Lorelai. I’m under no obligation to share this time. You have nothing I need.”

Frey’s jaw clenches as he listens. He steps forward.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Prince Freyjadour Falenas. You are?”

The woman blinks and looks at him as if she’s just realized Zweig isn’t travelling alone. Frey keeps from rolling his eyes. He can tell the two have history. Probably fucked, based on how much they seem to hate each other. And given the way she looks Frey up and down, she suspects that he and Zweig have fucked as well. Which, fair.

“I’m Lorelai and twice the Sindar scholar as this shitmuffin,” she says, gesturing at Zweig, who bristles.

“Look here, little g—”

There’s a snap as with a flash of movement she cracks a whip inches from Zweig’s face.

“You do not get to call me that!”

“O…kay,” Frey says. “Well that’s great, though! If you’re also a scholar, then we can use your help.”

Zweig’s mouth falls open. “You can’t be serious. We don’t need—”

“You’re not the one in charge of this little outing,” Frey says. “It’s the Dawn Rune that’s required, you said. Which means Lorelai here might have nothing you need, but I do. And really, with an _even better_ Sindar scholar, I’m wondering why exactly we need _you_.”

Zweig’s eyes bulge a moment before he huffs and pushs his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

“She’s hardly a scholar. More like a grave robber. A thug.”

“Given how difficult getting even this far in the ruins has been,” Frey says, “and that she got this far _alone_ , I’d say that’s not exactly a bad thing, do you? I say she’s welcome to come along, unless you have some sort of other reason you don’t want her along. Like…professional jealousy?”

“I would never!” Zweig spits, then seems to restrain himself. “I can’t deny she can be…useful in a fight. I will not be sharing _my_ findings or insights on the ruins with her, though.”

Frey doesn’t manage to keep from rolling his eyes. “You will _both_ be sharing your findings and insights with _me_. Or neither of you gets to come.”

He can feel the power of the Dawn Rune rising in him again, and glares at both of them. Zweig shrugs and nods, playing at cool nonchalance. Lorelai smiles, and there’s something in her face. Amusement, surely, and probably a satisfaction of seeing Zweig put in his place. But something else, as well, when she looks at Frey. A hunger, maybe. And Frey is not at all opposed to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have mixed feelings about Lorelai. On the one hand, she's often abrasively written in the games, and never the most useful (though never a bad choice for party member, either). She strikes me as super bi aro, because she can never settle on a weapon and because the Sindar are what's important to her. That said, she seems to have long standing sexual relationships with both Zweig and Killey (I have a different erotic fic featuring the three, for those interested). Anyway, I actually like her chemistry with a more aggressive Frey, though how it's going to work in the bedroom (or wherever they decide to fuck) will be interesting.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inside the inner workings of the Ceras Lake Ruins, Frey and Lorelai find out what they can about the Dawn Rune, and how it might be effecting Frey. The results are...unexpected, but definitely not unpleasant.

The heart of the ruins is full of secrets. A way to pump Ceras Lake. The promise of deeper works, as well. Frey can hardly pay attention as Zweig babbles on about it. The implications. The precious knowledge stolen back from the veil of history. Instead, Frey finds himself catching Lorelai staring at him, and staring back.

Every time he catches her she’s squinting at him like he’s a puzzle. Surrounded by what presumably is her life’s work, she keeps her attention firmly on him, and he can’t tell why. Kyle and Sialeeds have disappeared—past the door the Dawn Rune opened there have been hardly any monsters. Lyon looks bored out of her mind, but remains at Frey’s side.

“Hey, you mind keeping ol’ windbag busy while I have a private word with Lorelai?”

“Ol’ windbag? Didn’t you _just_ fuck him? And now you’re going to do likewise with someone you just met?”

Frey gives a toothy smile and puts his hands together towards her in supplication.

“Pleeeeeeeeease?” he begs.

Lyon closes her eyes and pouts. She can’t deny him when he’s trying to be cute. Not even if she suspects he’s about to make a big mistake. As long as it wasn’t one that might physically hurt him…too badly.

“Fine,” she says. “But when we get back to Raftfleet we’re doubling your training regimen.”

Frey grimaces, but nods.

“My eternal gratitude, exalted guardian.”

“Yeah, yeah. Get going.”

Frey smiles and slips away, leaving the drone of Zweig’s voice behind as he wanders into what he hopes isn’t the same corridor his aunt took for some quality Kyle time. He can feel Lorelai follow him, can almost feel the whole ruins, like they’re a part of him, like the stones are a second skin. He comes to an open room that feels empty, full of some strange stone devices. With ease he leaps onto on, swings on a bit of ancient piping to reach a higher platform, and sits, legs dangling, waiting.

Lorelai enters the room a moment later.

“Am I really so interesting?” he calls down to her.

She startles a bit at his voice, but smiles when she sees him perched above.

“You are,” she says.

“And here I thought you were a Sindar scholar.”

“I am.”

“Then why the interest in me and not…” He gestured to the room, the ruins.

“Ah, well, I’m interested in more than just architecture. The ruins are interesting, sure, but…do you realize you’re basically glowing?”

Frey tilts his head.

“Zweig might have an edge when it comes to books and research, but he’s useless when it comes to intuition. Sight. And he’s not exactly great with runes.”

“You, on the other hand?”

She lifts her hand, and the air crackles with electricity.

“I’m not the worst. And as much as Zweig’s interested in what your rune unlocked, what these dead ruins can tell him, I’m thinking there might be more to learn from what’s very much alive from the Sindar times.”

“I’m really not that old.”

She laughs, then suddenly is using her whip to encircle a high pipe, swing and pulling so that she bounds to his platform with ease. She stands over him, taking the whip pommel and gliding it under Frey’s chin, tilting it to she looks him in the eyes.

“There’s something about you. About that rune. You can feel it, right?”

She leans down, eyes searching his face, his body. Frey blushes, but doesn’t pull away, enjoys the scrutiny.

“Yes.” It’s little more than a whisper.

“And what does it feel like?”

In answer, he reaches up and places a bare finger against her cheek, the only place she’s really showing skin. It’s not electric, but there’s a kind of snap that happens when they touch, like the rune can taste their desires.

He pulls his hand away. Both of them are breathing heavy, heaving breaths.

“I want to feel more of that,” she says.

“For research?” Frey asks. In the back of his mind he’s afraid this is a kind of compulsion, that the rune is doing something to her mind. His cock screams at him to shut up and go with it, but he doesn’t want think—can’t shake.

“Well that,” she says, and her eyes are clear, lucid. “And you’re really cute.”

Frey laughs. He can feel no connection between them, no way that the rune is compelling them. It’s not a leash but a beacon, and Lorelai sounds like she knows exactly what she’s doing.

Frey reaches out again, touches her cheek, runs his fingers down along her jaw, her throat, to where her sweater hides the rest of her. She licks her lips, then reaches out, grasps the back of his neck with one gloved hands, and pulls him up into a kiss. Their tongues wrestle as Frey breaks skin to skin contact and lets his arms fall to his sides. And right away she presses her advantage.

Frey yelps as she makes quick work of securing his arms behind his back with her whip, securing them with practiced ease. He opens his mouth to feign protest but she stuffs a glove in instead. The other one she drops to the platform, then slips off her boots, her vest, her shirt, her pants. In underclothes, Frey can appreciate the toned curves of her body, the sleek muscles of her legs, the firm rounds of her ass and breasts. He swallows around the glove as she discards her underclothes as well, grinning as she steps toward him.

Too late her realizes that he might have wiggled free in the time that she’s been stripping. But then, he’s not sure that’s what he wants anyway. She pushes him down further, so that his butt rests on the platform between his knees, then removes the glove. Before he has a chance to speak, though, she straddles his face, holding his head with her hands. She’s looking down at him, their eyes locked, and he doesn’t hesitate.

She gasps as his tongue works, as he seeks to please her. Escape is definitely not what he wants, unless it’s for something to be done about his cock straining against the tight fabric of his leggings. As if sensing his discomfort, Lorelai steps back, pulling his head back by the braid to stop him from following her. He groans in a complaint that is quickly lost as she pushes him onto his back.

She’s not gentle as she hikes up his skirt and yanks down his pants and leggings. Frey hisses as the cool air of the room wraps around him. She grins at him, but hardly give him a chance to prepare before she straddles his thighs this time and guides him into her.

Frey moans as she starts to rock, one hand bracing against his chest, the other descending to where they meet. Distractedly, he can tell that he’s glowing in the dim light, Lorelai’s body underlit from him. It’s not just the rune, can’t be because it’s trapped beneath him. No, _he’s_ glowing, and he can feel the rune’s pulse through his whole body. And it’s like he can feel Lorelai as well, can taste her desires, her hopes and her fears.

They move, Frey gasping and moaning as he’s ridden, as Lorelai arches, comes. They both cry out, then, lost in the pleasure of the situation. Frey comes, loses himself, and for a moment there’s only light.

_“Mother! Mother, watch me!”_

_He’s running, launches into a cartwheel, braid brushing the floor. With his momentum he comes to his feet and jumps, trying the front flip he saw Lyon manage in training last week. At twelve, though, his body is not as lean as Lyon’s, not as strong. He feels the jump go wrong almost immediately. Eyes wide, the fear that strikes hardest is that she’ll see him fail._

_But before his can collide with the floor, strong arms catch him, and he’s looking up into the eyes of his father._

_“Might need a bit more practice with that one,” he says, and laughs._

_Frey pouts, shoots a look toward his mother. But she wasn’t even watching, was looking out the window at the city, expression hard, unreadable. Frey felt tears well in his eyes as Ferid put him down, patted his shoulder._

More light.

_“Mother, come see what I’ve found!”_

_Lorelai crouches in the half-ruined corridor. Her child’s body can fit places adults could not, and though Pippa, her mother’s bodyguard, disapproves, it’s obvious her mother doesn’t. Because of moments like this._

_The helmet gleams in the broken light. The ruins are picked over, but Lorelai has found something. Old. Covered in strange writing. She grabs it, turns back through the labyrinth of rubble and debris. With a straining pull it comes free, but as she clasps it to her chest the hallway starts to rumble, like it was the keystone holding everything together._

_Dust is falling all around her._

_“Lorelai, come out of there!” Pippa’s voice, edged in panic. But her feet won’t move._

The light fades. Frey looks up at Lorelai’s face, notices that she’s glowing, too.

“What the fuck was that?” she asks. There are tears in her eyes, and from the wet he feels on his chest, they are in Frey’s eyes as well.

“I-I don’t know.”

They stay that way a minute, breathing hard, bodies still connected. The pleasure from their climaxes has dulled some, but like the dawn rising it returns to them.

“Wanna try that again?” she asks, mischievous grin spreading on her face.

Frey’s not about to argue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying to explore some what the Dawn Rune is doing. tbh the Dawn Rune has probably the least personality of all the runes in the main series, and I want to change that some. What is it doing, and how does it change Frey? Well, that's yet to be seen. Wanting to make sure that it's not compelling. But given how Frey becomes so popular after he gets it, I'm thinking it's not hurting his chances of finding willing partners. Quite excited to explore this.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back in Raftfleet, Frey takes a moment to reflect on things, and has a heart-to-heart with the one person who's always been there for him.

With a pop, Frey finds himself back in Raftfleet. Or, well, maybe about six feet above and ten feet outside of the flotilla proper. With a cry he splashes into the water. When he comes to the surface, he finds that he’s in the Feitas along with Zweig and Lorelai. Sculling water and looking around, he sees Lyon and Viki are somehow on the nearest boat. He can’t be sure, but it sure does look like Lyon’s stifling a laugh. Viki at least looks apologetic.

“So sorry!” she yells. “I really was sure I had it that time.”

Frey sighs. She’s powerful, and he’s sure she’ll make a great addition to the war, but… He laughs. Already Zweig and Lorelai have made it to the boat. Frey takes his time treading after them. Lyon waits for him, even after Zweig and Lorelai wander off, still bickering. Lyon lowers a hand toward him, and Frey reaches for it, bites him…and pulls it as hard as he can.

With a shriek Lyon tumbles into the water. Frey laughs as she surfaces and nearly chokes at her expression, then does choke as she dunks him under the water. Twice, for what Frey assumes is good measure, then hauls him out onto the deck of the boat by his hair.

“Not funny, Prince.”

“Oh dear,” Viki says, wringing her hands and stepping nearer. “Shall I teleport you to somewhere to dry off.”

“No!” Lyon and Frey say together, though Frey says it around coughs made worse by his continued laughing.

“Oh, okay!” And with a smile and a blink she’s gone, leaving Frey still gasping on the damp wood.

Eventually the coughing stops but neither of them move from where they’re sprawled on the deck of the boat. Frey closes his eyes, feels the warmth of the sun on his body, drying him and his clothes. On his hand, the Dawn Rune tingles, perhaps reacting to the light, the connection to the Sun Rune.

“I think I’m changing,” Frey says after a while, eyes still closed.

“In a bad way?” Lyon asks. She doesn’t sound concerned, or upset. Just…curious.

“I don’t think so,” he says. “It’s just…I’ve spent so long thinking my life would be this thing, you know? Easy. Empty. Not that I hated it. But…”

The silence stretches, but Lyon doesn’t try to prod him. He should get out of the sun. He’ll burn, probably, though he’s not even sure of that. Will the Dawn Rune protect him from that?

“I do miss them. I do. I just…what do I do if I’m happier…like this?”

If they were here, he knows that he’d be useless. Extra baggage. Acting out in ways that would be as much about disgracing them as seeking his own pleasure. He thinks back to what Shoon had said in Stormfist. What Luserina had said in Rainwall. Both of them right.

“You don’t have to feel guilty that you’re happier,” Lyon says. “You didn’t kill your parents. They’d want—”

“I don’t care what they’d want,” he says, quietly but firmly.

Silence again.

Frey sighs and rolls onto his back. The sun is making quick work of drying his clothes.

“I feel bad for Lym, I do. I want to get her out from the Godwins’ control. I want to win this war. And I don’t care that it won’t really be me doing it. That Lucretia will do the hard parts, the planning, that she’ll tell me where to go, how high to jump. I like that, that she doesn’t expect me to figure that part out. I’m no good at it.”

“You could be.”

Frey laughs. Not harshly.

“Maybe. But I don’t want to be that person. I don’t want to be like Lucretia. I want to be…me. I know we’re doing something big, something important. But I also…I want it to be fun, you know? I feel…”

He rolls his shoulders, feels the warmth washing him. He thinks of Zweig, of Lorelai in the ruins. He knows that people think of him as a slut. And, fair. But it’s more than the sex. He can feel connections there. Can feel their lives, their memories touching. Because of the Dawn Rune? Maybe, but it didn’t make the connections less real. He could feel Lyon, too. Even Viki. He knew they were all a part of something bigger than one person. A web. A family. One of their own choosing.

“I feel like the sun’s coming up,” he says. “Like I’m finally awake. You were right. I need to find myself. I think I am. But…”

He turns again, opens his eyes, finds that Lyon is looking at him. He meets her gaze, aware just how complicated his feelings about her are.

“I don’t want to lose you, too.”

And there it is. He hates her in some ways, resents her. She’s the tie to his parents, to the way they never really saw him. Listening to her is sometimes like hearing the echo of Ferid. But he loves her, too. She’s always been there, the sister who wasn’t the little brat. Who wasn’t destined to rule. In many ways useless, just like him, because she was destined to guard the unimportant royal. Through his trysts and his tumbles, his missteps and his disasters, she’s been by him. Because she had to be? Maybe. But does she also want to be?

“I’m not going anywhere, Prince.”

That title. He hears it, hears the implications of it.

“I don’t want you to stay because you have to. Not out of duty, not even out of love. Sometimes you can love something that…that you need to get away from. I want you here because you want to be here. Not because…I need you.”

Lyon smiles and looks up at the sky.

“I’m not going anywhere, Frey.”

He smiles, rolls into his back, looks up at the same sky. Blue. Expansive.

He should apologize for all the ways he’s been a shit over the years. He tells himself he will, even if a part of him dreads it. No need to rush through everything in one go, though. As she says, they’re not going anywhere. They have time. There’s a whole war to be fought. Allies to be made. His smile widens, imagining all the people he’ll meet, the places he’ll see. Does his face warm at the thought of all the trouble he’ll get into, the hard bodies, the shuddering releases?

Maybe, but maybe it’s just the sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter done! Frey's starting to turn things around, I think. Still a fucking mess, but that's part of why I love him. He's still got a long way to go, but I think this starts him on the path that Luserina showed him. And I'm eager to see where he goes next. Not sure where I'll pick up again. I definitely want to one in Sable featuring Roy, but might do one in Lelcar first. That's a whole fucking mess. So we'll see.

**Author's Note:**

> Back to it. This chapter's not going to focus as much on one relationship, so much as on Frey's evolving relationship with himself. I actually wasn't planning on writing a section in Raftfleet, but want to spend a bit longer with this story, so here we are.


End file.
